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I’ve been kind of behind on updating you guys with news and stuff so here are a few updates.

First and foremost, the long-anticipated 21 Convention Documentary Series titled “The Community Tapes” just launched earlier this week with yours truly starting things off. Like with everything he does, including the actual 21 Convention live events, Anthony aka “Dream” really went all-out for this event. One look at even the filming quality (courtesy of the esteemed Michael Gottino) makes that very clear. Other featured documentary interviewees include Steve “El Topo” Mayeda, Drew Baye, Adam Lyons, and Bijal (t21c attendee). I have a lot of respect for those guys and I’m excited to see what they have to say.

As you’ll see in my interview, this series kind of takes us behind-the-scenes and into the minds of some of the speakers that have been featured at the live event. In my segment I talked about my journey, what I’ve learned and gotten from the community, and some of my insights and observations in being a life and dating coach. Take a look and let me know how you guys like it.

In keeping with this “behind-the-scenes” theme, I’ve also recently been featured/interviewed on the J The Ripper Show. JTR’s show is kind of unique. Instead of making it about pickup, he’s made a show that takes a very real, somewhat gritty look at seduction and specifically, the Casanova Crew. It’s neither the puahate/BKRS-style bashing nor the marketing-style promoting of most podcasts. Instead, he takes a documentary-style viewpoint, showing things as unbiased as possible and letting his audience make up their minds for themselves.

I like JTR. He and I go way back, and he’s one of those guys who’s just real. I remember reading his crazy FRs/LRs back in the day and I remember telling him at one point that despite all of the crazy adventures, I liked that he kept it real — for every pull/SNL/day2/whatever, he also included the blow outs, the rejections, and the ‘failures.’ Very, very few guys do that, coaches included. The guy definitely has some wicked skills, but he’s also somehow managed to stay humble, and I think that quality combined with his leadership ability plays a very large part in the success of the Casanova Crew. For an organization of that size, I’m impressed that one man has been able to keep it together this consistently and with near-universal respect among the members. Kudos to JTR for making that happen.

Download here (right-click and choose ‘save as’) or  Stream here (episode 13)

Here are JTR’s highlights from the show:

Behind the PUA Industry Part Deux!

Khan, the “Anti PUA”, writer for HUSTLER Magazine and Robotech comic book writer. Former Casanova Crew member.

*Afraid of RSD?!
*Afraid of J The Ripper?!?!
*Fake ass PUA Guru’s blowing smoke up dudes asses.
*Behind the scenes PUA Industry bullshit stuff Khan wasn’t supposed to know
*Guru’s spewing rehearsed methodologies vs. talking from the heart and keeping it real
*Certain Guru’s pathetically deceptively trying to pass off “sales letters” as actual FR/LR’s
*Khans encounter with a “professional guru”
*JTR Makes Out with Tichina Arnold from “Martin” & “Everyone Hates Chris”?
*Getting laid from bar girls vs. club chicks

DJ Fuji from the Dr Phil Show and Ex-Mehow Chief Instructor!

*Most Disfigured/Handicapped student (answer might surprise you!)
*Getting picked on when he was younger
*Joining the Marines and being under pressure
*Fake ass gurus thinking they can just come into this shit without paying thier dues
*Having two chicks stick their hands under his clothes while boyfriends watch
*Making out with chicks as chode boyfriend watches on
*Being on the Dr. Phil Show
*How he met Mehow and Mystery
*Was he disappointed in anyone’s performance on Infield Insider?
*Becoming Mehow’s #1 coach

For those of you who are in the Northern CA/bay area, I’ll be speaking FREE at the San Francisco Lair this weekend (6PM Sunday, May 2, 2010). I guess it’s not technically free because they’re asking for a small donation to help cover the costs of the seminar room, but I’m speaking entirely pro-bono (no charge).

I’ll be giving away over $1000 in free goodies, and will be doing a 3-hour free mini-workshop. AND in typical DJ Fuji-fashion, I’m ALSO letting you know a WHOLE 2 days in advance lol. Hey I’m a minority. We procrastinate, remember? Technically this is early. And you ain’t doing anything on Sunday afternoon anyway. Come down and say hello and meet a great group of local guys.

I’ll be covering things like:

• The simple technique you can learn in 10 minutes that will eliminate 90% of flakey phone numbers
• The keys to transitioning your interactions OUT of platonic-friend-zones
• Why the vast majority of guys fail in pickup… and what you can do to avoid being a statistic
• A complete breakdown of kinesthetic communication – how to touch, where to touch, when to touch, and why it’s 10x more important than you think it is
• The 5 mistakes you’re making right now that are preventing you from getting laid
• Tons and TONS more content… you aren’t going to want to miss this. It’s not a ‘lair talk,’ it’s a full-on, 3-hour workshop

Sign up here

In case you didn’t recognize the charmingly handsome fellow in the video, that’s me. What you’re watching is a ‘teaser’ trailer to the documentary that’s being produced by Dream, the organizer of the esteemed 21 Convention superconference event which I spoke at (and about) last year in 2009. In case you missed the free, 2 hour lecture from my 2009 speech, check it out.

Of particular note is that today is the last day you can get discounted tickets to the event, so if you’ve been procrastinating on this, now yesterday would be a great time to be proactive.

In fact, I highly recommend the live event in Orlando as not only do you get 4 days of awesome lectures from key players in this field, but El Topo and I (along with some of the other instructors) always do additional free training events afterward. Some guys even take students out into the field for free! That’s worth the cost of admission by itself.

At the end of the day, though, if taking care of this part of your life isn’t worth the couple of hundred bucks that you might otherwise spend on eating out and Starbucks, then you simply don’t want it bad enough. The desire must be there or no amount of training will help. If you truly want to get better, then take these opportunities. You’re selling yourself short if you hesitate and let them pass you by.

For those of you who ARE committed to this, sign up now and I’ll throw in a free 30-minute 1-on-1 phone coaching session! That’s worth almost $100 just by itself. Email me if you have questions or if you’ve signed up and are ready to schedule your coaching call.

I also want to say thanks to all the guys who have enrolled in my 1-day immersion course last weekend and this coming weekend. I honestly did not expect to get that kind of response, but that’s good because it means you guys are dedicated and it means that I’ll definitely be doing these types of events in the future. Stay tuned for more info on future boot camps and training events. I’m currently planning New York, San Francisco, and Austin, TX. I may also be heading to Toronto again this summer along with another 30-day Americas Tour in the fall.

It’s gonna be a busy year, gents. Time to stop thinking about things and start DOING.

Mike said:

I just saw this talk and Ratisse’ talk and I have a question about ejecting from conversations, because I see a method conflict.

Fuji makes the point that you should maximize your interactions by staying in them until you are asked to leave but not just when your audience shows disinterest.

On the other hand Ratisse describes a strategy for working bars/clubs/parties where you have short conversations with a good chunk of the people you are not ‘targeting’ . Then while the groups are comfortable, you try and pull away your target. AFC Adam describes something similar, except Ratisse even tries to treat individuals as groups as well. That’s a subtlety.

So is premature ejecltion so bad? You leave so you go on talking to other people. I was at a club last night practicing these quick conversations, but it was before seeing either of the talks and I ended up feeling I didn’t build enough rapport/comfort with them. The groups were too cohesive for me to just break people out of them. I admit I didn’t try to pull them away; instead I just found opportunities where there were 3-sets so I could just get the 3rd person into a conversation alone.

I feel there is a wide rift between these two strategies. I see the pros/cons in each ( differences in rapport and differences in whether you look too needy ) , but could someone shed some light on unifying them with a common principle ?

Hey Mike,

This is a great question. You’re definitely paying attention. Here’s how to reconcile these two seemingly-different strategies.

Ratisse is describing a variation on short-set theory. That is, a specific tactic used to create social proof and oftentimes jealousy plotlines. I use something like this fairly often.

What I was advocating in my speech is focusing on the skill set and pushing every set as far as it will go. The two are not mutually exclusive. They just focus on different goals and different skill sets.

At the risk of oversimplifying things, Here’s a quick flow chart to see which one you should GENERALLY use. For each question, if the answer is yes, go to the next step. If the answer is no, default to staying in set the way I described in my speech.

1. Do you open at least 5 sets per night?

2. Are you in set at least 75% of your night? In other words, if you’re in field for 3 hours, you should be “in set” talking for at least 2:15 of the 3:00 hours.

3. Can you start conversation that lasts at least 5 minutes with at least 50% of your sets?

4. Do you stay in set even when they shows you disinterest?

5. Do you have over a handful of lays (5+) within the last year from cold approach?

6. If you’ve answered yes to all 5 previous questions, try out short set theory and Ratisse’s strategies. Just don’t eject from sets because you’re afraid of rejection. Make ejecting a STRATEGY and not a REACTION. The best time to eject from a set (aside from after orgasm) is, ironically, when things are going really, really well.

If you guys haven’t seen the footage, it’s a nearly 2 hour lecture on “Getting Good at Game,” streamed FREE, courtesy of Dream. Take a look. Comments and questions always welcome.